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I’M GONNA GO TO HELL

Do you know what I discovered on my reentry into the world after a wonderful vacation?  Everything has gotten so much worse in American politics during the past two weeks while I was gone!  (How is that even humanly possible?)  Apparently, that orange creature from the dung lagoon hired some Alt-Right Neanderthal as his campaign chief to accelerate the fertilization of the Earth with their atrocious pile of racist excrement which has sped up the growth of Trump’s anti-Christ flowering of White Supremacy, hate, and bigotry in the world.  Wow, people! You were supposed to guard against this type of insurrection while I was gone.

Alt Right All Wrong Steve Sack The Minneapolis Star Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: Steve Sack, The Minneapolis Star-Tribune

Then I read that Trump thinks my life as an African-American is a total pile of shit as he painted an erroneously misleading picture that most Black folks live in inner cities and our lives summarily suck—across the board.

“Poverty. Rejection. Horrible education. No housing. No homes. No ownership. Crime at levels nobody has seen . . . You can go to war zones in countries that we’re fighting and it’s safer than living in some of our inner cities . . . Look, it is a disaster the way African-Americans are living.  We’ll get rid of the crime. You’ll be able to walk down the street without getting shot.”—Donald J. Trump

Well, thank you Oh “Great White Hope” for that hyperbolic and extreme assessment of my peeps and me!  No nuance on your part—no indication that you’ve ever spent any time in a predominantly Black community.  Good to know that we no longer need Jesus because you’ll save our sorry-asses from the dystopian hell of our own making.  Donald Trump—the relentless face of racist Birtherism against our outstanding first Black President went on to ask me—an African-American— “What do you have to lose?” by voting for him.  My response (should only be used when one’s laughter is so uncontrollable, it makes one pee one’s pants):

LMAOROTFBTCSTCNDBFOOTWIFOAGWLLBGWTHROOTSAIAKBAYB”

(TRANSLATION: “Laughing My Ass Off Rolling On The Floor, Biting The Carpet, Scaring The Cat, Nearly Dying By Falling Out Of The Window In Front Of A Guy Who Looks Like Bill Gates, Who Then Horrified, Runs Out On The Street And Is Accidentally Killed By A Yellow Bulldozer”.

Losing John Cole The Scranton Times Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: John Cole, The Scranton Times Tribune

Oy!  It made me want to go back on vacation with my family and lose myself in wondrous bliss.  While I was away, I tuned out all the news for the entire holiday and spent all of my vacation relishing in the wonderful life God had blessed me with while my grandson and I performed an old woman/seven-year-old dance routine to Meghan Trainor’s “Me Too.”

“I thank God every day

I woke up feelin’ this way

And I can’t help lovin’ myself . . .

If I was you, I’d wanna be me too . . .”

Mema and Grandson Dancing

Mema and Grandson Dancing/Photo Credit: K. Tomczyk

I should have stayed on vacation with my grandson who is sweet, loving, kind, generous, thoughtful, caring, and wise beyond his years who taught me how to do the Nae-Nae and Snap Chat this year.  But I didn’t and each day away from all that beautiful Christ-like innocence has made me want to stand up and holler—especially after I read recently that even after all the horrid, racist, crude, misogynist, vile things that have been revealed about Donald Trump, his Evangelical Christian support is still strong AND GROWING! Even a child can see that The Donald is an asshole—why can’t so-called Christian leaders?  (Some of these “Christian” Trump supporters have declared that their fellow Christians (moi) will burn in Hell if we don’t vote for Trump.)  In a dream I had last night, I sent my grandson a Snap-Chat voice message and asked him why was he so much more mature than grown-ups who claim to be leaders in the Church?  He replied:   “They must not have gone to school.  Everything I know, I learned in kindergarten.”

When I awoke, I decided to write a kindergarten report card for Donald Trump to those Christian leaders in the hopes that they would take stock of Trump’s character before it is too late, and withdraw their support since it seems he has been unhinged since Jump Street and nothing like Jesus, whom they claim to love and worship.

tRUMP AND Evangelicals Wolverton Cagle Cartoons

Cartoon used by permission: Wolverton, Cagle Cartoons

***

TO THE PARENTS OF LITTLE DONNIE TRUMP

MATURITY PROGRESS REPORT

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Christian Evangelical:         DONALD TRUMP’S FINAL GRADE:   _F__

As you know, it has come to the end of the year, and I am afraid the kindergarten school of life will not be able to transition Little Donnie to the grown-up world of grade school.  He is failing miserably on all accounts—so much so, we teachers are hard-pressed to figure out how to turn him into a decent human being.  He shows signs of an entrenched narcissistic personality disorder, a lack of a moral center, a detachment from reality and the pain and suffering of anyone but himself, and a total disregard for the feelings of others.  In short, Little Donnie Trump lacks the social skills needed to progress to the next level.

Although Little Donnie is flunking kindergarten civic values across the board, I felt it best only to list the most pertinent ones so as not to overwhelm you.  Although we think it is probably too late, we ask that you review this limited feedback and set up a meeting with his teachers in order to discuss the further humanization of Donald John Trump so that he might someday progress to the first grade.

DOES NOT GET ALONG WITH OTHERS

  • Little Donnie shows signs of being a rabid misogynist. He was over-heard in the hallway hurling insults at some of the kindergarten girls as “fat pigs, dogs, slobs, bimbos, disgusting animals, crude, rude, obnoxious and dumb,” “with blood flowing out of their whatever. . .”
  • Little Donnie is mean and cantankerous.  He made Little Mika Emilie Leonia Brzezinski cry the other day when he accused her of being “off the wall, a neurotic and not very bright mess!” (He really seems to have a problem with female confrontation.)

Trump Analysis David Fitzsimmons The Arizona Star

Cartoon used by permission: David Fitzsimmons, The Arizona Star

UNABLE TO RECOGNIZE TRUTH FROM FICTION

  • Little Donnie refuses to adhere to truth. His teachers discovered last year that he had made himself the face of a racist birther movement against the first Black class president of our school. His teachers know that Little Donnie knows where President Obama was born because we did an entire school project on Hawaii two years in a row and featured all the children who had been born there: Donnie Ho, Barack Obama, and Bette Midler who Little Donnie promptly called “grotesque” before he stormed out of the classroom.
  • Little Donnie thinks the Muslim, Black, and Latino kids in his class adore him. They don’t—they abhor him, except for the mentally challenged Little Omarosa and Little Ben Carson.

UNABLE TO TREAT OTHERS WITH RESPECT

  • Little Donnie is a bigot and a bully
  • Little Donnie is scary and out of touch with humanity. He once said to his entire class that he could stand in the middle of 5th Avenue and shoot somebody, and he wouldn’t lose any class support.

Trump and African Americans FB John Darkow Columbia Daily Tribune Missouri

Cartoon used by permission: John Darkow, Columbia Daily Tribune. Missouri

***

ELEANOR’S SELAH (“AHA” MOMENT) ON CHRISTIANS FOR TRUMP

I am discovering that I am absolutely flabbergasted and mortified at the Evangelical Christian support of Donald J. Trump for president.  These dudes and dudettes have truly sold their souls to the Devil, and they have the audacity to tell me I’m gonna go to Hell if I don’t vote for Trump because it is Jesus’ will that The Donald becomes our next president.  I call bullshit on that false doctrine!  After Trump’s blanket, condescending statement to African-Americans this week trying to get more than 1% of us to vote for him, I have an answer for Little Donnie:  “Everything—Black folks have everything to lose if we vote for you!”  We’ll lose 100 plus years of ongoing progress in education, housing, and jobs, not to mention the legacy given to my grandson by President Barack Obama that currently inspires and promotes his ability and possibility (and all Black children) to become president of the United States someday. 

Little Donnie, you know not what you speak or to whom you speak.  Some of us Black folks may need a helping hand now and then, but we are not a stupid people.  African-Americans know you are condescending to us to get the White suburban vote by attempting to make them think you’re not a racist. (Most White people aren’t stupid, either.  They know you grossly exaggerated the stats regarding poverty, education, and lack of jobs in our inner cities.)  Go back to Trump Tower, Little Donnie.   I, on the other hand, will go back to my very nice life as an African-American, and my decision to vote for anybody else but youcome November.

TRUMP GODZILLA Luojie China Daily China

Cartoon used by permission: Luojie China, Daily China

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THOUGHT-PROVOKING QUOTES EXPLAINING WHY JESUS IS PROBABLY WEEPING RIGHT ABOUT NOW AT THE STUPIDITY IN SOME CHRISTIAN CIRCLES

“I realize that most of Trump’s ardent fans do not take kindly to being lectured by the likes of me. But it is with a certain degree of genuine sympathy that I say what has to be said: Your candidate is a flake. A fraud. A bag of air. A con man. A joke.” [emphasis, mine]—Eugene Robinson/The Washington Post

“He is egotistical, bombastic, and brash. He often lacks nuance in his statements. Sometimes he blurts out mistaken ideas (such as bombing the families of terrorists) that he later must abandon. He insults people. He can be vindictive when people attack him. He has been slow to disown and rebuke the wrongful words and actions of some angry fringe supporters. He has been married three times and claims to have been unfaithful in his marriages. These are certainly flaws, but I don’t think they are disqualifying flaws in this election.”Wayne A. Grudem/prominent evangelical theologian, seminary professor, and author

“Mr. Trump’s Twitter presence is tightly interwoven with hordes of mostly anonymous accounts trafficking in racist and anti-Semitic attacks. When Little Bird, a social media data mining company, analyzed a week of Mr. Trump’s Twitter activity, it found that almost 30 percent of the accounts Mr. Trump retweeted in turn followed one or more of 50 popular self-identified white nationalist accounts. At times, a circular current seems to flow between white nationalists and Mr. Trump on Twitter.”—Nicholas Confessore/NYTimes

Trump being himself Steve Sack, The Minneapolis Star Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: Steve Sack, The Minneapolis Star-Tribune

WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE AUTHOR?  Check out www.eleanortomczyk.com

WANT TO READ THE AUTHOR’S LATEST BOOKS?  Monsters’ Throwdown and Fleeing Oz are both on sale at Amazon (Paperback and Kindle).

REFERENCES

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/new-trump-campaign-chief-faces-scrutiny-over-voter-registration-past-charges/2016/08/26/bf5bc3b2-6b98-11e6-ba32-5a4bf5aad4fa_story.html?hpid=hp_rhp-top-table-main_bannon-905pm%3Ahomepage%2Fstory

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/eidos/2016/07/a-good-man-justifies-a-wicked-deed-grudem-on-trump/?ref_widget=popular&ref_blog=jacoblupfer&ref_post=are-religious-right-leaders-dobson-falwell-and-reed-cheap-dates-or-worse

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/08/25/us/politics/donald-trump-black-voters.html?_r=0

http://www.salon.com/2016/08/26/donald-trump-has-no-love-for-black-people-his-outreach-and-pivot-are-really-aimed-at-winning-over-nervous-white-voters/

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/star-of-the-show/2016/08/25/a539743e-6afd-11e6-8225-fbb8a6fc65bc_story.html?hpid=hp_no-name_opinion-card-c%3Ahomepage%2Fstory&utm_term=.5afef9b6352e

http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2016/june-web-only/whos-who-of-trumps-tremendous-faith-advisors.html?start=1

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Eleanor Tomczyk and “How the Hell Did I End Up Here?” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 
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Posted by on August 27, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

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TELL THE TRUTH AND SHAME THE DEVIL

Do you know what I discovered after returning home from visiting my grandson this weekend?  The Donald waltzed up to Capitol Hill and the Speaker of the House tucked his tail between his legs, bowed down and affixed his lily-white lips firmly against The Donald’s orange ass.  America, we are so screwed!

Paul Ryan and The Donald Steve Sack The Minneapolis Star Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: Steve Sack, The Minneapolis Star-Tribune||Cagle Cartoons

Everyone keeps telling me (a Born-again Christian but not “that kind of Christian”) there is no way in Heaven or Hell The Donald can occupy the White House in November—I just need to have faith. They tell me we Americans will come to our senses and stop this xenophobe, racist, serial adulterer, misogynist, liar, Ayn Rand disciple, and mammon-worshiper who sits at the right hand of Satan before he gets too close to the throne because the Holy Rolling Christian Evangelicals will never throw their weight behind Donald Trump’s candidacy.  Well, the Barbarian is at the White House gate and he’s being carried in on a gilded perch shouldered by Christian Televangelists (Jerry Falwell, Jr., Pat Roberson, Jan Couch of TBN, Paula White, Gloria and Kenneth Copeland, Clarence McClendon—a Black preacher who should know better—and the slick-haired Joel Osteen just to name a few).  The raised royal sedan chair is being led by The Donald’s lead house Negro, Dr. Ben Carson (a.k.a., another “Born-again Christian” who is trying to ram his form of religion down the throats of everyone who doesn’t think like him).  (Insert picture of “The Scream” by Expressionist artist Edvard Munch.)

No Way Trump John Cole The Scranton Times Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: John Cole, The Scranton Times-Tribune||Cagle Cartoons

When I read about the meeting between Paul Ryan and Donald Trump which should have been titled:  “The Day Paul Ryan Sold His Soul to the Devil,” I was so upset that I fell into somewhat of a depression (Mr. Ryan considers himself to be a fine, upstanding Christian as most of the GOP does, claiming to be the standard bearer of family values and all).  While in my comatose state, I dreamt that I was in a Judge Judy-style courtroom where my alter ego was the judge (The Dalai Mama), a conglomerate of Trump’s ex-wives, pissed-off feminists, ripped-off Trump University students, the poor, assorted Mexicans, a bunch of Muslims, and decent human beings in general were the Plaintiff, and the GOP was the Defendant.  As with all my dreams and fantasies, I won the battle for truth.  (If only life were that easy…)

Trump Stealing soul of Gop RJ Matson Roll Call

Cartoon used by permission: RJ Matson Roll Call||Cagle Cartoons

*** 

JUDGE DALAI MAMA’S NO-NONSENSE COURT

ANNOUNCER:    [Disembodied voice heard offstage]Entering through the door on the left of Judge Dalai Mama’s Court is the Plaintiff ‘Truth’ who is suing the Defendant ‘GOP’ for breach of contract.  Entering through the door on the right is the Defendant, the GOP.”

BAILIFF:  [Big burly Black guy in police uniform]ALL RISE for the trial of Truth vs. the GOP!!   The Court of the No-nonsense Judicial Circuit is now in session.  The Honorable Judge Dalai Mama is presiding.”

BAILIFF:  [Swearing in the Plaintiff and the Defendant] “Do you promise the testimony you are about to give will faithfully and truthfully conform to the facts of this trial?  Do you swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God?”

PLAINTIFF AND DEFENDANT:  “I do!”

BAILIFF:  “You may proceed.”

JUDGE DALAI MAMA:  “Befo’ I call on either one of y’all to testify, you both better know that I don’t take no crap—you hear me?  My court ain’t called the “no-nonsense” court for nothin’.  You mess with me, and I won’t hesitate to knock you upside yo’ head.  Capisce?”

PLAINTIFF AND DEFENDANT:  “Yes, Your Honor.”

JUDGE DALAI MAMA:  “All right—now that we all on the same page—why don’t we start with the Plaintiff.  Ms. Truth, it says here that you are suin’ the GOP for breach of contract.  Why?  It says here in my court brief that you two used to be lovers.”

PLAINTIFF:  “’Used to be’ are the operative words, your honor.  This jerk has played me for the last time.  I’ve put up with his xenophobia, I’ve put up with his stinginess, I’ve put up with his lyin’, and I’ve put up with his duplicity, but I’m drawin’ the line with his latest punk-ass stunt.”

JUDGE DALAI MAMA:  “Ms. Truth, the term ‘punk ass’ is not a legal term.  I would caution you to stick to courtroom language, Girlfriend.”

PLAINTIFF:  “Sorry, Your Honor.  He’s just got me so upset, I can barely breathe.  I just found out that he has urged the Republicans in Congress to support that pig Donald Trump in spite of all the disparaging ways The Donald has treated me.  I’ve tried to reason with the Defendant in the past, but yesterday was the final straw.”

JUDGE DALAI MAMA:    “What happened yesterday?”

PLAINTIFF:  “The Defendant rolled over and took it up the ass from The Donald when Paul Ryan and Donald Trump had that sham meeting on Capitol Hill after Paul Ryan intimated that he’d never support that jerk.”

JUDGE DALAI MAMA:  [Judge’s gavel thunders throughout the courtroom as the judge pounds in rapid-fire succession against her desk.)  “Hey, hey, hey—courtroom decorum Ms. Truth, or you’ll be fined for bein’ in contempt.  Get it together, Baby!”

Ryan Endorsing Trump Dave Granlund Politicalcartoons com

Cartoon used by permission: Dave Granlund, Politicalcartoons.com||Cagle Cartoons

PLAINTIFF:  “Yes, Your Honor . . . sorry.  What I’m sayin’ is that yesterday was bad, but today was the pièce de résistance.  I woke up to the news that the Secret Service (and rightfully so) is investigating Trump’s long-time butler of 30 years/Mar-a-Lago tour guide ‘historian’ (Anthony Senecal) because he has recently published quite a few Facebook screeds about wanting President Obama (and his wife) to be executed.  Referring to the President as ‘our pus headed president’ and ‘kenyan (sic) fraud’–saying he should be ‘hung for treason,’ as well as stating, that the President ‘should have been taken out by our military and shot as an enemy agent in his first term.’ He went on to say that Muslims should be ‘shot at the shore’ instead of being allowed to come into our country and for added security, our President ‘should be hung from the portico of the White Mosque.’  And you know what? The Defendant—the GOP—hasn’t said a mumbling word of chastisement to a man who may soon be a finger-click away from our nuclear bombs about the fact that he has tolerated such an asshole in his employment for over thirty years.  (You can’t convince me that someone who has worked that intimately with The Donald hasn’t shared his horrid views with ‘The King,’ as Mr. Senecal affectionately refers to him.) This butler’s apple doesn’t fall far from the tree and just undergirds what a bastard Donald Trump is underneath all that Republican smooshing—you can bet your sweet ass on that truth!  Why in God’s name doesn’t the Defendant distance himself from this Neanderthal?”

JUDGE DALAI MAMA: [Furious banging of the gavel is heard] “Order . . . order in the court!  Ms. Truth, this is your last warning about court decorum.  Don’t make me come down there and smack you upside your head.  I think you need to stand down and check yo’self.  (Sweet Jesus, I’m gonna need myself a stiff drink befo’ this trial is over.)  Now, will the Defendant, Mr. GOP, please state your rebuttal?

DEFENDANT:  “Absolutely, Your Honor!  I have a prepared statement to read in my defense which should put this case to bed in my favor.  May I proceed?”

JUDGE DALAI MAMA: “As you wish, Mr. GOP, but hear this:  My mama didn’t raise no fools.  Tread carefully, ‘cause if I catch you lyin’, you’re toast.”

DEFENDANT: “No problem, Your Honor.  My Republican brand stands for Truth (with a capital ‘T’):  family values, Christian virtues, intelligent leadership, and compassionate conservatism.  After all, my party is the one that freed the slaves.  Why would I jeopardize my reputation supporting a candidate who didn’t represent those values?  And to prove my point, I would like to point out to the Court that our Republican nominee for the Presidency is supported by prominent Christian televangelists and Christian University presidents (Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell, Jr. for example) and prosperity preachers who think God wants us all to be rich, just like Mr. Trump.  In fact, these ‘Name-it-and-claim-it’ preachers deem to call The Donald their friend.  They simply adore him.  All that gold that surrounds him, the private planes that transport him, and the beauty queens that have adorned his arms through the years are just what the prosperity preachers believe to be the righteous man’s due.  Not only do these pillars of our Christian churches support Mr. Trump but many of them have gone on record to proclaim his ‘Born-again status.’”

Make America Grunt Again John Cole The Scranton Times Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: John Cole, The Scranton Times-Tribune||Cagle Cartoons

JUDGE DALAI MAMA:  “Is that so, Mr. GOP?”

DEFENDANT:  “Yes, indeed, Your Honor.  Why one of the top female prosperity-doctrine preachers, Ms. Paula White, has preached to a crowd of thousands that Mr. Trump is ‘saved’ and should be our next president.  Ms. White has gone on record to say that she gave him a Bible signed by none other than the great Rev. Billy Graham.  She says that the Bible even included a note with a ‘prophetic word’ over Mr. Trump—although, I’ve never seen it, so I’ll just have to take her word for it.  On top of all this glowing support, Ms. Paula White is a leader of a predominantly Black congregation.  Your Honor, don’t you think if Mr. Trump were such a racist xenophobe as Ms. Truth suggests, that a multi-cultural congregation would not so readily pay for Ms. White to own a condo in Trump Tower as well as support her shopping and plastic surgery addiction?”

JUDGE DALAI MAMA:  “Well, like my mama used to say: ‘a fool and his money is easily parted.’ But go on.”

PLAINTIFF:  “Seriously?!  Your Honor, are you listening to him?  These Christian televangelists are cut from the same cloth as Trump—they are like two peas in a pod.  What about his failed Trump University that is being sued by ex-students—poor people—who went into credit-card debt as much as $35,000 because Trump allegedly promised he could ‘turn anyone into a successful real estate investor, including you. . ?’  It was a scam—a bunch of real estate workshops in hotel ballrooms!  Oh my God, doesn’t any other Christian besides me see this subterranean creature for what he truly is?   Oh, and what about his crude chats with shock-jock Howard Stern in the late 90s when the two of them would critique women’s looks (and I quote), “…Her boob job is terrible. They look like two light posts coming out of a body.” And this:  “A person who is very flat-chested is very hard to be a 10.”  He has boasted for years about all the women chasing him and his stud-like sex life, not to mention his love ‘em and dump ‘em thrice married sorry behind.

The man is crude, rude, and should be stewed! But instead, he’s being justified and heralded by leading Christian Evangelists.  And what about the $85,000 Trump paid for four full-page, explosive ads in NYC newspapers to demand the death penalty against five Black and Latino teenagers who were wrongfully convicted for the brutal assault, rape, and sodomy of a White twenty-eight year old investment banker?  The Huffington Post said he called them “rapists, thugs, killers, wild criminals, muggers, murderers, crazed misfits?”  The only problem was: THE 14-16 YEAR OLDS TURNED OUT TO BE NOT QUILTY AND THEIR CONFESSIONS HAD BEEN COERSED!!  Many years later, another man who was a serial rapist and murderer serving a life sentence in prison fully confessed to committing the crime all by himself.  He knew details about the horrid event that only the investigators could have known, and his DNA matched the crime scene DNA, whereas it never matched the accused teens.  Marry that confession with a record of rampant investigative negligence and you have reasonable doubt, as you well know Your Honor.  The teens were exonerated after spending five to thirteen years in prison and given millions in a settlement from NYC a decade after their false imprisonment which The Donald hysterically railed against.   If Trump had had his racist, hot-headed way in 1989, five teenagers—children (angels by no means and hooligans for sure, but still children)—would have been turned into a line in the Billie Holiday song, ‘Strange Fruit’‘Blood on the leaves and blood at the root… strange fruit hanging from the poplar trees.’  And here’s the rub:  Trump never, ever apologized, and still publicly questions the Central Park Five’s proven innocence, because the man is incapable of admitting he is wrong. [1] [2] [3]

If Donald Trump had the power and the money in the late 80s to call for the annihilation of the lives of five Black and Latino children who were falsely accused of a crime, what does the GOP think he’ll do in a hot-headed moment against any number of American minorities, an Arab nation, Mexico, or China?”

Trump

Cartoon used by permission: Steve Sack, The Minneapolis Star-Tribune||Cagle Cartoons

JUDGE DALAI MAMA: “Hum, hum . . . I think I’ve heard enough to make a rulin’.  Will the Plaintiff and the Defendant please stand?  It is clear to me that the Defendant, Mr. GOP, has turned his back on Truth and pretty much sold his soul to the Devil as it pertains to the justification of that dog, Donald Trump.  Mr. GOP has swallowed the wormwood, sorry-ass nature of Mr. Trump—hook, line, and sinker—for the supposed sake of unity to try and ‘unblacken’ the White House in November (as Larry Wilmore would say).  Win at all cost seems to be the GOP’s motto.   Well, Mr. GOP, I’m here to tell you that God don’t like ugly, and I’ve got a feelin’ that your ass is gonna be grass come November, ‘cause the Lawd will not be mocked—you hear me?  Therefore, I, Judge Dalai Mama, rules in favor of the Plaintiff—Truth!  After all this slime, Girlfriend needs a hot bath and a drink. This court is hereby dismissed!”

Trump Bitter Pill Rick McKee The Augusta Chronicle

Cartoon used by permission: John Cole, The Scranton Times-Tribune||Cagle Cartoons

***

ELEANOR’S “SELAH” (“AHA” MOMENT) ABOUT THE GOP AND DONALD TRUMP

I am discovering that I am trying not to panic, but Lord have mercy, this shit just got real with Trump and Paul Ryan’s sham meeting with all but four or five members of the Republicans in Congress throwing their support behind The Donald.  The Speaker of the House who looked like a deer caught in the glare of headlights must have used the word “encouraging” at least half a dozen times when referencing his meeting with Trump, which is like saying, “My lunch with Beelzebub was very ‘encouraging’ as he yanked me down into Hell!”

Now don’t get me wrong, I am not in the tank for Hillary.  I will vote for her, but I will be holding my nose the entire time just on the premise that we don’t need another Bush/Clinton in the White House—two families have held the presidency for twenty years!  (How is it that in a country of 323,814,755 people as of May 16th the best we could find to run for the highest office in the land were a clown car of jabronis on the Republican side, one grumpy old man on the Democrat side promising free shit to kids with no way to pay for it (no kid wants to ever grow up and pay for anything), and two qualified candidates (Jeb Bush and Hillary Clinton) from two washed-out presidential dynasties?  If we manage to get through November without the unholy, racist, pig Donald Trump becoming president (ARE YOU LISTENING, GOD; IT’S ME, ELEANOR?), then we need to start beating the bushes to find men and women of integrity who will come out of hiding by 2020 and lead our great nation in a manner which it deserves because my heart can’t take much more of this.  Moving to Canada won’t be far enough to get away from the madness that will ensue. I might just have to exit stage left of this planet and go hang out with my God.  Just sayin’.

Hillary John Cole The Scranton Times Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: John Cole, The Scranton Times-Tribune||Cagle Cartoons

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SOBERING QUOTES ABOUT TRUTH, THE GOP, AND DONALD TRUMP

“And I can teach you, kinsman, how to shame the devil—by telling the truth! ‘Tell the truth and shame the devil,’ as the old saying goes. If you do have the power to call him up, then bring him here. And I’ll swear I have the power to shame him into leaving. Oh, for goodness sake, tell the truth and shame the devil!”—Character of Henry ‘Hotspur’ Percy from Henry IV by Shakespeare

In the 1990s, when another Clinton was president, conservatives became fond of the phrase “character counts.” This was a way of scoring points against Bill Clinton for his sexual predations and rhetorical misdirections, as well as a statement that Americans expected honor and dignity in the Oval Office. I’ll never forget the family friend, circa 1998, who wondered how she was supposed to explain the meaning of a euphemism for oral sex to her then 10-year-old daughter. . . Endorsing Mr. Trump means permanently laying to rest any claim conservatives might ever again make on the character issue.”Brett Stevens, the Wall Street Journal from article: “Hillary the Conservative Hope”

None of the Above Rick McKee The Augusta Chronicle

Cartoon used by permission Rick McKee, The Augusta Chronicle||Cagle Cartoons

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WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE AUTHOR?  Check out www.eleanortomczyk.com

WANT TO READ THE AUTHOR’S LATEST BOOKS?  Monsters’ Throwdown and Fleeing Oz are both on sale at Amazon (Paperback and Kindle).

***

REFERENCES

http://www.salon.com/2016/05/10/the_christian_rights_trump_ageddon_how_donald_trump_is_tearing_religious_conservatives_apart/

http://www.wsj.com/article_email/hillary-the-conservative-hope-1462833870-lMyQjAxMTI2NjE0MDYxNzA5Wj

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/nolongerquivering/2016/05/the-crucifixion-and-nevertrump-what-the-cross-teaches-us-about-politics/?utm_source=SilverpopMailing&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Patheos%20050716%20(1)&utm_content=&spMailingID=51321189&spUserID=MTIzNjQ2MzAzOTI4S0&spJobID=920767889&spReportId=OTIwNzY3ODg5S0

http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2016/05/trump-butler-anthony-senecal-facebook-kill-obama

http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2016/05/donald-trump-white-nationalist-afp-delegate-california

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/ryan-and-trumps-painful-sham/2016/05/12/7e6bccfa-1876-11e6-924d-838753295f9a_story.html?hpid=hp_no-name_opinion-card-a%3Ahomepage%2Fstory

http://www.salon.com/2016/05/13/why_donald_trumps_racist_butler_actually_matters/

http://thinkprogress.org/politics/2016/03/15/3760287/donald-trump-prosperity-preaching/

https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/was-donald-trumps-education-venture-trump-university-a-scam/2015/09/13/299ed9c8-52c0-11e5-933e-7d06c647a395_story.html

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/donald-trump-central-park-five_us_56c78713e4b041136f16fd4e   [1]

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2014/10/19/decoding-the-crime-of-the-century-the-real-story-of-the-central-park-five.html  [2]

http://www.newyorker.com/news/amy-davidson/donald-trump-and-the-central-park-five  [3]

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Eleanor Tomczyk and “How the Hell Did I End Up Here?” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 

 
6 Comments

Posted by on May 14, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , ,

RIP GOP

Do you know what I discovered about famous people dying and their subsequent media coverage?  Just recently Harper Lee, Pat Conroy, Nancy Reagan, and Angela “Big Ang” Raiola (breakout star of Mob Wives) died, and within hours—sometimes minutes—everything from multi-paragraphs to multi-pages of obituaries were published.  It was freaky.  I learned that obituaries of famous people are written long before their deaths if they are terminally ill, old, or habitually self-destructive.  That way, when they do kick the bucket, the Media can be Johnny-on-the-spot and publish their obits in a timely manner.

When I awoke this morning and read the news about Donald Trump’s significant wins on Super Tuesday, I could hear the death knell for the GOP, and I knew what I had to do:  write an obit for the Republican Party whose inevitable demise is on its way, if it hasn’t happened already.  I thought it would be rather entertaining to “very loosely” base the GOP’s obituary on bits and pieces of the actual one that was used for Abraham Lincoln as taken from page 1 of The New York Times, April 16, 1865.  (I couldn’t resist the irony.)

Repub Hari Kari Daryl Cagle CagleCartoons com

Cartoon used by permission: Daryl Cagle, CagleCartoons.com

***

GOP—ONCE KNOWN AS “THE GRAND OLD PARTY”—IS OFFICIALLY DEAD!

Reality Show Actor Donald Trump Believed to be the Assassin

By Blogger, Eleanor L. Tomczyk

***

Party of Lincoln David Fitzsimmons,The Arizona Star

Cartoon used by permission: David Fitzsimmons, The Arizona Star

It is now ascertained with reasonable certainty that multiple assassins (led by a gang leader) were engaged in this horrible crime against the Grand Old Party.  The leaderan actor named Donald Trumpwas the one who engaged in the final kill shot against the GOP, and the other companions of his (Republican Congress, Tea Party, Birthers, Mitch McConnell, Citizens United, Koch Brothers, Fox News, Right-Wing Radio), are being hunted down for their complicity in the Elephant’s demise even as this obit goes to press.  Vivid descriptions of Trump’s accomplices (racism, xenophobia, misogyny, homophobia, greed, and violence) have been posted all over the nation’s media outlets so that they can hardly escape unnoticed. It appears from intelligence collected from the GOP’s murder scene that the assassination has been a long time coming, but it previously stalled out because it was believed that the Republican Party had an adult—Jeb Bush—who they thought would carry the day, and thus extend its life a little longer.  But Mr. Trump slaughtered Bush in a high profile shoot-out earlier in the year, and then rode on to Florida to commit the dastardly deed against the Grand Old Party itself.

Trump eating the Gop Pat Bagley Salt Lake Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: Pat Bagley, Salt Lake Tribune

The official notice of the death of the GOP was given by the Media this morning to the American public, and the memorial arrangements were announced:

      First—the arrangements for the funeral of the late GOP were referred to the Republican Establishment which is in a state of disbelief and is trying to broker a convention in Cleveland to resurrect the Elephant from the dead.  All the Bible-believing Evangelicals have been called upon to fast and pray for this miracle.

      Second—The Great Latino Hope (Marco Rubio) went into hiding with his tail between his legs after being mortally wounded by a stray bullet from The Donald in his assassination attempt against the GOP.  Rubio was last seen sobbing his heart out in the Florida Everglades as he lamented:

“My whole life I’ve been told being humble is a virtue, and now being humble is a weakness and being vain and self-absorbed is somehow a virtue. My whole life I’ve been told no matter how you feel about someone, you respect everyone because we are all children of the same God—and now being respectful to one another is considered political correctness.”

AT WHICH POINT THE ALLIGATORS WERE HEARD RESPONDING IN UNISON:  “AND WHY WASN’T THAT SAME COURTESY EXTENDED FROM YOU TO PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE?  KARMA IS A BITCH ‘LITTLE RUBIO.’”

Rubio and Florida Dave Granlun, Politicalcartoons com

Cartoon used by permission: Dave Granlund, Politicalcartoons.com

In the meantime, Nancy Reagan, the wife of the “god” the GOP worships, was high-fiving her fortune teller in the Great Beyond for escaping the Earth just in time to be with her man before she had to witness the assassination of the Republican Party by Donald Trump and the Duck Dynasty set.

Nancy Reagan Disappointment David Fitzsimmons The Arizona Star

Cartoon used by permission: David Fitzsimmons, The Arizona Star

The assassin left behind at the crime scene a brilliant display of the rancor and violence he would use to pull the Party together now that he had accomplished his goal of obliterating the GOP.  When asked by CNN host Chris Cuomo what Mr. Trump would do if he ended up in Cleveland a few delegates shy of 1,237 and the party leaders demand a contested GOP convention, he gave a bone-chilling answer: 

“I think you’d have riots.”

“[I’m] representing many millions of people: If you disenfranchise those people, and you say, ‘I’m sorry, you’re 100 votes short’…I think you’d have problems like you’ve never seen before. I think bad things would happen.”

Trump Leprechaun Threats Rick McKee The Augusta Chronicle

Cartoon used by permission: Rick McKee, The Augusta Chronicle

The GOP’s body was removed from Florida and has been embalmed.  The Grand Old Party of Lincoln was wrapped in the American flag, and it has continued across the country for proper viewing by the American people at various primaries and will arrive in Cleveland in July where it will be put to rest.  It will be America’s last chance to see the remains of a once proud political group who helped Abraham Lincoln free the slaves.

Flags over the Republican Establishment hearts are at half-mast. Scarcely any business is being transacted anywhere either on private or public account.

The bells are tolling mournfully. All the Republicans are in the deepest gloom and sadness. Strong men weep in the streets.  China is using Donald Trump’s antics and vulgarity as a warning to its citizens about the dangers of democracy.  The grief is wide-spread and deep—in strange contrast to the joy that was so greatly manifested around the world when Barack Hussein Obama won the Presidential election—not once—but twice. 

This is indeed a day of gloom.  RIP GOP!

Future of Gop John Cole The Scranton Times Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: John Cole, The Scranton-Times Tribune

***

ELEANOR’S “SELAH” (“AHA”) MOMENT ABOUT THE GOP’S ASSASINATION

I am discovering that as I meditate on the very real aspect that Donald Trump may be our Republican nominee for the President of the United States, I understand that this will probably destroy the GOP as we’ve come to know it—shatter it into a million pieces.  Maybe that will be a good thing.  I don’t rejoice over this.  I used to be a Republican, and I think our country needs a two (or more) party system to keep us in balance.  But I don’t feel very sorry for my Republican friends because they brought this on themselves.  When Trump spearheaded the birther movement against President Obama (knowing full well, that every charge was a lie), the Republican Establishment “winked” and thought it was a hoot.  When Mitch McConnell declared that he would lead the Republican Congress in a charge to make Obama a one-term President and obstruct him at every turn, the rest of the GOP cheered and rushed in to help.  When the jerk, Joe Wilson, screamed at President Obama in the midst of a State of the Union address, “You lie!” the rest of the Republicans applauded the consummate disrespect of a sitting president.  In the midst of all this, they got into bed with big business, big money, and special interests—leaving the middle class behind to slide into poverty, and the poor to slide into Hell.  Now they wonder why so many people are so pissed at them.  So angry that 67% of Republicans are willing to lend their support to an assassin.

To all my dear sisters and brothers in the Republican Party who refused to speak up against the sins of the GOP all those years ago, up to today’s obstructionism by Congress against the President’s pick for the next Supreme Court Judge—I give you Donald Trump.  Karma is truly a bitch!

Supreme Court Obama choice Dave Granlund Politicalcartoons com

Cartoon used by permission: Dave Granlund, Politicalcartoons.com

***

WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE AUTHOR?  Check out http://www.eleanortomczyk.com

WANT TO READ THE AUTHOR’S LATEST BOOKS?  Monsters’ Throwdown and Fleeing Oz are both on sale at Amazon (Paperback and Kindle).

Supreme Court obstruction David Fitzsimmons The Arizona Star

Cartoon used by permission: David Fitzsimmons, The Arizona Star

REFERENCES

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/steven-skeldon/this-is-not-my-republican-party_b_9477064.html

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2016/03/13/how-the-republican-party-became-a-failed-state.html

http://www.politico.com/story/2016/03/trump-cruz-kasich-convention-220846

http://www.salon.com/2016/03/14/joe_scarborough_surrenders_msnbc_host_admits_party_has_shattered_its_brand_but_wont_confront_whats_driving_the_gops_crisis/

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Eleanor Tomczyk and “How the Hell Did I End Up Here?” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 
8 Comments

Posted by on March 17, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

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FRANKENSTEIN TRUMP

(This week’s post is about the results of Super Tuesday amongst the Republican candidates and is very loosely based on the Frankenstein horror story by ‎Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley, written in 1818.  My humble apologies to Mrs. Shelley for upstaging her monster who almost looks tame compared to mine.)

Frankenstein cartoon bizarro.com Dan Piraro

Cartoonist Dan Piraro, www.bizarro.com

Do you know what I discovered when I awoke on the morning after Super Tuesday?  I had had a dream.  A dream so filled with horror that I doubt I’ll be able to shake its effects for a very, very long time.  It was a dream that filled my heart with terror and my mind with unshakeable images.  But wait:  lest you think I exaggerate, let me recount the tale, and you can judge for yourself.

***

I dreamt that I was a captain of a mighty ship.  My name was Captain Jane Walton of the Clear Vision Shipping Company.  My ship was the Pure of Heart and this was its maiden voyage which had set sail for the Port of True North.  We had been at sea for many months when we encountered a rather large being on a battered lifeboat that had seen better days.  Both lifeboat and being seemed to be on their last legs, so to speak, and were sinking fast.

I ordered my crew to rescue the creature, and after much exertion they managed to bring the mutilated lump aboard.  It was hard to tell what its original form was at first.  Man, woman, animal, alien?  Who could tell because it was broken and shattered into what seemed like a million pieces.  As the form unfolded on the deck, I realized it was an elephant—albeit barely recognizable due to its lacerations and multiple bruises.  The elephant was incoherent and could barely stand up.

Shattered Republicans Daryl Cagle CagleCartoons com

Cartoon used by permission: Daryl Cagle, CagleCartoons.com

“Creature, what is your name,” I asked?  “And what brings you to such a desperate moment in such a watery grave?”

“My name is Dr. GOP Frankenstein,” replied the discombobulated creature as he gasped for air.  “I was beaten and pulverized by a creature of my own making, and he set me adrift to die at sea.  Had you not come along dear Captain, all would have been lost.”

I could tell that the elephant had once been a stately fellow, but little of its original grandeur remained.  As my brain recalled a long forgotten history of a pachyderm that had represented a people who were part of Abraham Lincoln’s Party—the emancipator of the slaves—I grew sad at how far it had fallen.

As I nursed Dr. Frankenstein back to health, he began to share the incredible story of his downfall with me.  The doctor told me he was born in 1854—birthed in opposition to the Kansas–Nebraska Act which was trying to extend slavery into the territories.  He was a party that in its heyday had been supported by everyone from White Protestants, to factory workers, to farmers, to abolitionists, and African-Americans.  But somewhere along the way, he had lost his vision and went in search of the secret to encompassing total greed and ultimate power and discovered that what he sought existed on the island of Ayn Rand-NRA.  Their nation’s motto is:  “I’ve got mine, too bad you don’t have yours—it sure sucks for you!  Now get out of my face before I blow your brains out with my ‘2nd Amendment Right-to-Carry AK-15.’”

Convinced that he had enough knowledge to construct a super mini-me to take over the land of White House and gain control of the country’s citizens, Dr. GOP Frankenstein created a being out of different body parts:  a self-righteous form of Christianity, obstructionism, greed, racism, self-centeredness, crudeness, sexism, and the poorly educated.  The organs of the creature were anti-Muslim, pro-guns, anti-taxation, anti-Obama, anti-abortion, anti-immigration, and anti-climate control.

One fateful night, Dr. Frankenstein threw the electrical switch and voila! A monster was born:  Frankenstein Trump!

Trump revuses to avow David Duke Milt Priggee www.miltpriggee com

Cartoon used by permission: Milt Priggee www.miltpriggee.com

Unlike his namesake in the story of old (Dr. “Victor” Frankenstein), GOP was at first elated with his creation.  When Frankenstein Trump fled to the land of Birther and relentlessly accused the first Black President of the United States of not being born in America, his creator didn’t stop the monster’s onslaught.  In fact, Dr. Frankenstein smugly smiled to himself and gleefully cheered behind closed doors because he had made a vow to destroy Citizen Barack Obama and make him a one-term President.  When Frankenstein Trump threatened to ban all Muslims from entering the country and building a giant wall to the heavens to keep out all Mexicans, Dr. GOP cheered—immigration of the brown people south of the border solved—check!  When the monster seduced the White Evangelicals, White disgruntled men, White supremacists, and the poorly educated, forcing Dr. Frankenstein to create another monster and turn them into the Bride of Frankenstein, Dr. GOP facilitated the making of a monster bride and pretended it was for the saving of America Land.  This was good, GOP thought—this was power—this was the way to the land of White House!  The more inept and corrupt the monster became, the more his creator looked away until it was too late.

February 26, 2016

February 26, 2016

Cartoon used by permission: Adam Zyglis, The Buffalo News

On March 1st—known as Super Tuesday—Frankenstein Trump escaped from his creator and devoured some of Dr. GOP’s favorite sons.  Frankenstein Trump had turned into a raging, blustering, crude, no-nothing bully.  But the monster had become “HUUUGE” and strong, and try as he could, Dr. Frankenstein was unable to reign in his misguided creature.  For the first time the doctor was afraid—very afraid.   By the time I rescued him that fateful night, Dr. GOP was beside himself.  He said he had “tried everything to stop his creation’s momentum, but nothing was working.”  It was looking like—unless a miracle happened—that Frankenstein Trump would be President Trump of the greatest country on Earth in November, and Dr. GOP would splinter into a million pieces—never to be heard from again.  The process had already begun.

What was not known until Dr. Frankenstein confessed it to me is that Frankenstein Trump was not his first monster creation.  GOP had created the Cuban twins Marco Rubio and Ted Cruz—one he adored, the other he despised.  Both hated their most recent brother-creation and vowed to destroy him for the sake of their father.

Marco Rubio David Fitzsimmons The Arizona Star

Cartoon used by permission: David Fitzsimmons, The Arizona Star

Ted Cruz is going to Save us from Trump David Fitzsimmons The Arizona Star

Cartoon used by permission: David Fitzsimmons, The Arizona Star

But Frankenstein Trump just poked them both in the eyes and laughed in their faces while Dr. GOP Frankenstein sobbed over the monster he had assembled.   The Doc told me of a plan to make a multimillion-dollar assault against Frankenstein Trump by carpet bombing Florida, Illinois, and Ohio with a ruthless ad blitz to stop the monster from winning the Republican nomination.  I laughed because even I knew it was too little too late.  I could hear the voice of Alex Castellanos (a veteran media consultant) blowing in the wind, who had attempted an earlier “Stop Frankenstein Trump” assault and failed:  “A fantasy effort to stop Trump. . . exists only as the denial stage of grief.”

Trump Acceptance by GOP Bill Day Cagle Cartoons

Cartoon used by permission:  Bill Day, Cagle Cartoons

Dr. GOP left my ship when we pulled into the Harbor of Sanity, and we haven’t spoken face-to-face since.  Every once and awhile I hear voices blowing in the wind mingled with screams coming from the hills.   The monster keeps screaming, “I win, I win—losers,” and tepidly taunting his haters with comments like “I won’t disavow the KKK, OK” as he shouts to his hyped-up village followers: “I WILL MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN,” as the villagers raise their pitch forks and rifles in salute to him: “Frankenstein, Frankenstein, you’re our man—if you can’t save us, no one can!”  And if I listen carefully, I hear the blood-curdling screams of Dr. GOP whose soul the creature has fractured and is devouring inch by inch—bit by bit.

Super Tuesday Buffet Rick McKee The Augusta Chronicle

Cartoon used by permission: Rick McKee, The Augusta Chronicle

***

“CAPTAIN JANE WALTON’S ‘SELAH’” (AHA) MOMENT

I am discovering that as I go about my daily life, praying that the Almighty God will protect my country from the demon that Dr. GOP has wrought, I wonder how many lives he will devour before finally being destroyed.   Recently one evening, as I double-checked to see that all the doors in my home were barred against the invasion of this monster, I saw a news conference from his lair—Mar-a-Lago.  There Frankenstein Trump stood in all his glory—beating his chest and crowing his victory over his creator, Dr. GOP.  It was a sight to behold, but nothing was more cringe-worthy than seeing the chubby-ass monster he had enslaved—Governor Chris Christie.  There the Governor of New Jersey stood—in invisible chains, silently screaming—looking just as one should look when one has sold one’s soul to bask in the presence of an evil entity.  It was then I heard a rumor that the Grand Pooh-bah of the Republican party, Mitt Romney, thinks that “Donald Trump is a phony, a fraud” and that he’s “playing the American public for suckers”  and “under Trump, America would cease to be a shining city on a hill.”  But all that did was confuse me.  Wasn’t Romney the “good Mormon” man who had basked in the glory of Frankenstein Trump’s embrace just four years ago?   Didn’t this Mormon man of God—an elder in his church—say that “Having his [Trump’s] endorsement is a delight . . .” That he was “honored and pleased” and that it “meant a great deal to have his [Trump’s] endorsement?”  Now Romney planned to put on a robe made from a profile in courage to come to the town square, leading a mob to try and kill the monster.

All I could think of as a single tear slid down my left check:  “Oh, Dr. GOP, what hath thou wrought, what have you done?  You have sold our American soul to the Devil!”

Chris Christie's Future Steve Sack The Minneapolis Star Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: Steve Sack, The Minneapolis Star-Tribune

***

QUOTES ABOUT TRUMP, OOPS, I MEAN FRANKENSTEIN

“If I cannot inspire love, I will cause fear!” ― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

“When falsehood can look so like the truth, who can assure themselves of certain happiness?”― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

“You are my creator, but I am your master; obey!”― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

“Accursed creator! Why did you form a monster so hideous that even you turned from me in disgust?”― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

“It’s becoming obvious that supporting or not supporting [Trump] isn’t a political choice.  It’s a moral choice. The man is evil.”Tweet by Stuart Stevens, top adviser to Mitt Romney’s presidential campaign in 2012

 “Mr. Trump’s character is antithetical to many of the qualities evangelicals should prize in a political leader: integrity, compassion and reasoned convictions, wisdom and prudence, trustworthiness, a commitment to the moral good. . . . Why a significant number of evangelicals are rallying round a man who exposes them as hypocrites is difficult to fathom.”—Peter Wehner, The New York Times

***

WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE AUTHOR?  Check out www.eleanortomczyk.com

WANT TO READ THE AUTHOR’S LATEST BOOKS?  Monsters’ Throwdown and Fleeing Oz are both on sale at Amazon (Paperback and Kindle). 

REFERENCES

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/republicans-face-a-moral-choice-will-they-oppose-trumps-bigotry/2016/02/29/36bd87ee-df2e-11e5-846c-10191d1fc4ec_story.html?hpid=hp_no-name_opinion-card-f%3Ahomepage%2Fstory

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/the-strong-hand-at-the-center-of-trumpisms-dangerous-worldview/2016/02/29/fd2c9ada-df17-11e5-846c-10191d1fc4ec_story.html?hpid=hp_no-name_opinion-card-e%3Ahomepage%2Fstory

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/donald-trump-is-the-monster-the-gop-created/2015/07/08/5b0bb834-259b-11e5-aae2-6c4f59b050aa_story.html?tid=a_inl

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/the-gop-has-two-weeks-to-take-down-donald-trump/ar-BBqeaaW?ocid=spartandhp

http://www.salon.com/2016/03/01/cruzs_last_stand_ted_cruz_thinks_hes_a_messiah_but_hes_a_pathetic_dunce_about_to_fall_on_his_face/

http://www.salon.com/2016/02/27/one_bully_endorses_another_bigger_bully_why_chris_christie_hitched_his_wagon_to_donald_trump/

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2016/02/26/bully-new-jersey-governor-endorses-failed-atlantic-city-casino-owner-for-president.html

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2016/02/26/christie-hated-trump-19-days-ago.html

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Eleanor Tomczyk and “How the Hell Did I End Up Here?” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 

 
8 Comments

Posted by on March 3, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , ,

TRUMP GOT SCHLONGED (OOPS! I MEANT FIRED)!

Do you know what I discovered about the Iowa Caucus this year?  Who did Iowa have to sleep with to become the first major electoral event to pick the nominees for the Presidential run?  It has gotten out of hand and on my every last nerve!  They don’t even have a primary for Pete’s sake!  Their caucuses have some cutesy definition which means a “gathering of neighbors.”  Well, apparently these neighbors are predominantly white and 65% Born-again, Evangelical Christians, who don’t look like the rest of America (why not do the first Presidential caucuses in California, New York, or Florida?), thus making Iowa a Republican candidate’s wet dream.  Then mix that with the hysterical hype of the media (these people really need to get a life), and it must drive normal, level-headed Iowans nuts because it certainly has done so to me.

Iowa Caucus Crazies Steve Sack The Minneapolis Star Tribune

Used by permission: Steve Sack, The Minneapolis Star-Tribune

Only 3.4% of Iowans are Black, and what few of them that there are don’t tend to lean Republican.  I noticed that earlier on in the week.  I also noticed that as the Republican race narrowed down to two candidates—Trump and Cruz—I could barely sleep.  I’m not voting Republican this year (the field is way too nutty for my taste); I am just trying to make sure that the “right” Republican wins the nomination so the Democratic Presidential candidate can win in 2016.  Both Cruz and Trump seem hell bent on destroying the country and the GOP, so it is just a matter of which nut-case needs to rise to the top whose ass can be kicked by a Democrat.  One is a buffoon and the other is a mean son-of-a-bitch who believes that he is God’s Messiah sent to save our country.

Trump and Cruz Marian Kemensky Slovakia

Used by permission: Marian Kemensky, Slovakia

The problem that I’m having is that I am a Born-again Evangelical Christian (and Black) who is intelligent, sane, rational, loving, and caring.  I cherish science, I believe the Earth is in climate-change Hell, and I consider all humans my sisters and brothers who deserve my respect.  I am nothing like the people who caucused for Trump and Cruz, and there are many, many more like me—it’s just that we’re hardly ever given airtime.  The Trump and Cruz supporters’ blind stupidity scares the shit out of me.  It keeps me awake at night.  I’ll do my best to defeat them in the long run, but what could I do about Iowa?  I’m just a little ol’ chubby-ass retiree trying not to fall and break a hip.  I went to bed on Monday night wondering if Punxsutawney Phil would see his shadow or not in the morning, as well as what wingnut would win the Republican caucus, and how little control I had over either situation.

It was then I had a dream about a rodent.

punxs

Punxsutawney Phil Meme, via earthsky.org

That furry, fat rodent, Punxsutawney Phil appeared to me while I fitfully slept—tossing and turning—muttering a deep-seated prayer:  “Not the Trump, oh God, noooooo . . . have you no mercy!”

PUNX:   Psst . . . psst—hey human, wake up!  It’s me, Punxsutawney Phil.

ME:        Huh?  Punx?  Is that you?  What are you doing here?  Shouldn’t you be in Pennsylvania, and aren’t you a little early?

PUNX:   I heard you moaning in your sleep, and I just dropped by to tell you that I plan on not seeing my shadow on February 2nd— so not to worry.

ME:       What do you mean you plan on not seeing your shadow?  You’re rigging your coming out?  You can’t do that—that’s immoral.

PUNX:   What do you care?  By not seeing my shadow, you’ll get to have an early spring.  So be happy and rejoice.  Besides, ain’t nobody got time for this bogus, anti-science, shadow-seeing shit.  I need a purpose in my life besides being some fat guy’s pet.  So I’ve joined the political underground movement:  “Groundhogs against Trump—he’s stupid, he’s lazy, he’s a fool, and he’ll never be President.”  I’ve been in Iowa messing with the caucus outcome.  Have you heard the news—Trump got schlonged, and it’s all my doing!  I fired his ass!

ME:       Really, a rodent fired The Donald? Isn’t that a bit braggadocious?  I find your boast hard to believe.  Trump didn’t win Iowa?

Trump Gets Slonged John Darkow Columbia Daily Tribune Missouri

Used for permission: John Darkow, Columbia Daily Tribune, Missouri

PUNX:   Hell to the no, Trump didn’t win in Iowa!  And he’s sooooo pissed.  He’s spinning it here—he’s spinning it there—but the reality is he once said that if he didn’t win Iowa he would consider it “a big, fat, beautiful waste of time!”  But he came in second—he’s such a looooser!

Loser Taylor Jones Politicalcartoons com

Used by permission:  Taylor Jones, Politicalcartoons.com

ME:        Well, hot diggedy-dog!   But how did you affect this outcome?  May I remind you that you are a furry little animal—you don’t even have opposable thumbs!

PUNX:   We groundhogs have our ways—we’ve been messing with humans for years.  Will spring come early; will spring be delayed?   Let’s just say, I got up there and helped serve Trump his balls on a platter.

ME:        Impressive!  Well then, who came in first?  If you tell me that Ted Cruz did, I am going to go screaming into the night.  Even Trump is better than that mean-spirited, rod-up-the-ass, holier-than-thou, Ted Cruz!

PUNX:   Yes, Cruz came in first, but don’t you worry about him.  We’re forming another group for New Hampshire and beyond: “Groundhogs against Cruz—the meanest, nastiest, son-of-a-bitch that ever walked the Earth.”  I’ve rallied all my sisters and brothers against him.  We have a bone to pick with Cruz—him and his gun-tottin’-animal-killin’ self.  We’re the ones who started the whisper campaign that he is not a natural-born citizen.  The Constitution is going to bite him in the butt—you watch: (“No Person except a natural born Citizen . . . shall be eligible to the Office of President”).  Wouldn’t that be a hoot if Cruz got disqualified after the way he spread the vicious lies that President Obama wasn’t born in America?  Let’s see:  Hawaii vs. Calgary.  Which one belongs to another country?  Heh, heh, heh, heh!

Anyway, we groundhogs are marching all the way to New Hampshire to the thunderous chant of:

“Cruz was born in Canada/from Calgary he hailed/Too bad he didn’t stay there/ ‘cause we plan to see him fail!”

The groundhogs are on it, Babe!  We just needed to give you humans a little help by letting the gas out of that windbag, Trump.  Now you know that even the animals are disgusted with your Republican presidential candidates.  And you’re welcome!

ted-cruz

PUNX:   Well, gotta run.  Go back to sleep.  Don’t be afraid.  It is all going to work out.  See you in New Hampshire, Girlfriend.  Look out, Repubs—here we come—‘cause even us rodents have risen up against your craziness!

Groundhogs fleeing Iowa to NH RJ Matson Roll Call

Cartoon used by permission: RJ Matson, Roll Call

***

ELEANOR’S SELAH (“AHA”) MOMENT ABOUT TRUMP/CRUZ

I am discovering that sometimes I wish I did have the powers to awaken the entire Earth (animals, rocks, and trees included) to do my bidding like a war counsel from the Lord of the Rings.  I would use that power to course-correct the insanity coming out of the Republican candidates for President.  A world with either one of the top two Republican contenders in the White House—Trump or Cruz—will be a world engulfed in war, with civil rights abolished, healthcare destroyed, and women’s rights rolled back.  In fact, any of those Republican candidates would be horrifically painful—throwing us back into the 1950s.  What horrifies me is that there is a political force who are Evangelicals who claim to love God, and they are so fearful and deluded that they cannot see that neither Cruz nor Trump would be someone Jesus would condone. They actually think they are doing God’s will.  When I hear these candidates speak, they sound frighteningly similar to the radical Islam that they claim they want to protect our country from.

But I have no magical powers.  I only have my keyboard, my prayers, and a mother’s love that wants to leave a better world for my children and grandchildren.   Therefore, I will keep sounding the alarm until the morning after voting day in 2016.  In the words of Sister Joan Chittister, “When you don’t know what to do—do something.”  Maybe I’ll wake up enough people with my writing to turn the tide on them all (blind Evangelicals, hateful politicians, and corrupt presidential candidates).  Until then—on to New Hampshire!

The Press Daryl Cagle CagleCartoons com

Cartoon used by permission: The Press Daryl Cagle CagleCartoons.com

***

QUOTES ABOUT THE TWO WHO WOULD LOVE TO BE KING

“Who the heck is Donald Trump to fire me? I regret I didn’t tell Donald Trump, ‘You need to fire your barber. I’m sorry. I ain’t feeling you, man. You’re fired! I fire you, Donald Trump.’”Sinbad

Nobody could like Donald Trump, surely, except his mother. No one really likes The Donald. But how can you not have respect for a guy who’s been down on the floor and just keeps coming back? Nothing will keep Donald Trump down until they drive a wooden stake in his heart and a silver bullet in his brain.”Felix Dennis

“…Cruz’s speeches are marked by what you might call pagan brutalism. There is not a hint of compassion, gentleness and mercy. Instead, his speeches are marked by a long list of enemies, and vows to crush, shred, destroy, and bomb them. When he is speaking in a church the contrast between the setting and the emotional tone he sets is jarring.”David Brooks/The Brutalism of Ted Cruz/NYTimes

WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE AUTHOR?  Check out www.eleanortomczyk.com

WANT TO READ THE AUTHOR’S LATEST BOOKS?  Monsters’ Throwdown and Fleeing Oz are both on sale at Amazon (Paperback and Kindle).

REFERENCES

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/all-donald-trump-does-is-win-%e2%80%93-until-he-doesnt-now-what-happens/ar-BBp1Wgf?ocid=spartandhp

http://www.cnn.com/2016/02/02/opinions/republican-iowa-results-stanley/index.html

http://www.cnn.com/2016/02/02/politics/new-york-daily-news-donald-trump/index.html

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2016/02/02/trolls-and-nazis-mourn-trump-loss.html

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2016/02/01/donald-trump-the-hater-is-now-a-loser.html

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/just-how-dumb-does-donald-trump-think-americans-are/2016/02/01/6de4e37e-c927-11e5-a7b2-5a2f824b02c9_story.html?hpid=hp_no-name_opinion-card-f%3Ahomepage%2Fstory

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/ben-carson-accuses-ted-cruz-of-using-dirty-tricks-to-win-iowa/ar-BBp1Mmw?ocid=spartandhp

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Eleanor Tomczyk and “How the Hell Did I End Up Here?” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 

 

 

 
6 Comments

Posted by on February 3, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

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THE PALIN (“Nevermore”)

A cynical poem, ripped off, truncated, and bastardized (as only this blogger can do) from the illustrious Edgar Allan Poe’s narrative poem “The Raven”—first published in 1845.

Palin and Trump I David Fitzsimmons The Arizona Star

Cartoon used by permission:  David Fitzsimmons, The Arizona Star/Cagle Cartoons

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary,

O’er GOP’S death to civil right’s lore—

    While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,

As of someone caustically rapping, flapping at my chamber door.

“’Tis some sweet, dear friend,” I muttered, “banging at my chamber door—

            Only this and nothing more.”

January 22, 2016

January 22, 2016

Cartoon used by permission:  Adam Zyglis, The Buffalo News/Cagle Cartoons 

    Ah, distinctly I remember it was one month after December;

And each dying ember wrought a GOP politician crashing to the floor.

    Eagerly I wished to borrow—vainly from my hope for tomorrow

    Because of the past few months of sorrow—sorrow for America’s GOP horror—

For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels named “U.S. of Merkica”—

            Nameless here for evermore.

Steve Sack The Minneapolis Star Tribune

Cartoon used by permission:  Steve Sack The Minneapolis Star-Tribune/Cagle Cartoons

    And the silken, sad, uncertain rustling of each purple curtain

Thrilled me—filled me with political terrors never felt before;

    So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating

    “’Tis a visitor of hope maybe entreating entrance at my chamber door—

Some late person of intelligence entreating entrance on the GOP political floor;—

            THIS IT IS and nothing more.”

    Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,

“Sir,” said I, “or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore;

    But the fact is I was napping, and so raucaously you came rapping,

    And so cacaphonously you came screeching, rapping at my chamber door,

That I know even Russia heard you”—here I opened wide the door;—

            But saw vapidness there and nothing more.

Sarah Palin I Nate Beeler The Columbus Dispatch

Cartoon used by permission:  Nate Beeler, The Columbus Dispatch/Cagle Cartoons 

    Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,

Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before;

    But the screeching was unbroken, and the craziness gave no token,

    And the only words there spoken were the shouted words: “I’M HERE, YOU LIBERAL WHORES!!”

Then I screamed, and an echo murmured forth the words, “OH SHIT! THE BITCH IS BACK!”—

            Said I merely this—and nothing more.

Sarah and Trump II John Darkow Columbia Daily Tribune Missouri

Cartoon used by permission:  John Darkow, Columbia Daily Tribune, Missouri/Cagle Cartoons

    Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter,

In there stepped a crazy maven of the nutty days of yore;

    Not the least obeisance made she; not a minute stopped or stayed she;

    But, with stupid mien of religious crazy, perched above my chamber door—

Perched upon a bust of Obama just above my chamber door—

            Perched, and shat, and nothing more.

    Much I marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so grossly,

Though its answers little meaning—little relevancy bore;

    For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being

    Ever was soooo stupid perched upon my chamber door—

Bird or beast upon the sculptured bust above perched this scary sore,

            With such a nickname as “Trump’s New Boor.”

Palin support John Cole The Scranton Times Tribune

Cartoon used by permission:  John Cole, The Scranton Times Tribune/Cagle Cartoons

    But the Raven (Sarah Palin), standing alongside Herr Trump, spoke much

Gibber-jabber, as if her soul in those words she did outpour:

*“How ’bout the rest of us? Right-wingin’, bitter clingin’, proud clingers of our guns, our God, and our religions, and our Constitution. Tell us that we’re not red enough? Yeah, coming from the establishment. Right.”

*“Well, and then, funny, ha ha, not funny, but now, what they’re doing is wailing, ‘Well, Trump and his, uh, uh, uh, Trumpeters, they’re not conservative enough.’ ”

*“And he, who would negotiate deals, kind of with the skills of a community organizer maybe organizing a neighborhood tea, well, he deciding that, ‘No, America would apologize as part of the deal,’ as the enemy sends a message to the rest of the world that they capture and we kowtow, and we apologize, and then, we bend over and say, ‘Thank you, enemy.’ ”

*“He is from the private sector, not a politician. Can I get a ‘Hallelujah!’ ”

    Nothing sensical did she utter—not a brain cell did she flutter—

    Till I scarcely more than muttered, “WHAT THE FUCK DID TRUMP DEPLOY?—

On the morrow SP must leave us, as my Hopes have flown before.”

            Then the bird said, “Drill, Baby, Drill; bitch—going nowhere, nevermore.”

Palin Speak Steve Sack The Minneapolis Star Tribune

Cartoon used by permission:  Steve Sack The Minneapolis Star-Tribune/Cagle Cartoons

       Then, methought, the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer

Swung by demons whose foot-falls tinkled on the tufted floor.

    “Wretch,” I cried, “Satan hath sent thee—by his demons he hath lent thee

    Old man McCain unleashed thee 2008 of yester yore;

Curse him, curse him—go back to Alaska and return no more!”

Screamed I, in hysteria:  “BEGONE, DEMON—FOREVERMORE!”

    “Be that word our sign of parting, bird or fiend!” I shrieked, upstarting—

“Get thee back into the tempest and the night’s Alaskan shore!

    Leave no black plume as a token of the lies thy soul hath spoken!

    Leave our 2016 unbroken!—quit the bust above my door!

Take thy beak from U.S. ‘Merika’s heart, and take thy form from off my door!”

            Screamed my soul, “FOREVERMORE.”

Sarah and Trump Milt Priggee www miltpriggee com

Cartoon used by permission:  Milt Priggee, www.miltpriggee.com /Cagle Cartoons

    And The Palin, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting

On the bust of the Prez just above my chamber door;

    And her eyes have all the seeming of a demon’s that is dreaming,

    And the lamp-light o’er her streaming throws her shadow on the floor;

And my soul from out the shadow that lies floating on the floor

            Is in mourning for my country, and its future

‘Til this trumpet vanishes with her Trumpee—

out the door,

FOR-EV-ER-MOOOOORE!

Trump Mouth Taylor Jones Politicalcartoons com

Cartoon used by permission:  Taylor Jones Politicalcartoons.com/Cagle Cartoons 

*All actual Sarah Palin quotes, which were uttered (word for word) by her when she endorsed Trump for president in Iowa.  Be afraid . . . be very afraid, and WAKE UP AMERICA!  Any candidate who welcome’s Sarah Palin’s endorsement and allegedly proposes to give her a position in his cabinet must be looney tunes. 

WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE AUTHOR?  Check out www.eleanortomczyk.com

WANT TO READ THE AUTHOR’S LATEST BOOKS (Monsters’ Throwdown and Fleeing Oz)?  ON SALE NOW AT AMAZON!

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Eleanor Tomczyk and “How the Hell Did I End Up Here?” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 
14 Comments

Posted by on January 25, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

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HAVE COURAGE AND BE KIND

Do you know what I’ve discovered since the dawn of 2016 in just the first half of January?  Situations have gotten pretty scary and a tad bit nuts in our world, as you all know.  2015 was a really nutty time to be an inhabitant of Earth, and nobody has any idea how things are going to turn out in 2016.  If you’re a pessimist and see the glass half-empty then America will be fully engaged in WWIII by 2017, North Korea will have obliterated South Korea, Japan and much of China with a hydrogen bomb, Trump will be president, and concentration camps will dot the countryside filled with Mexicans, Muslims, and whatnots (TBD, since racism never knows any boundaries).  BUT if you’re an optimist and see the glass half-full (as I do), then 2016 just might surprise us all for the better.

New World Order Paresh Nath The Khaleej Times UAE

Cartoon used by permission: New World Order, Paresh Nath, The Khaleej Times UAE/Cagle Cartoons

I can find encouragement in anything.  I look for hope on a daily basis.  As I watched Disney’s 2015 live action version of Cinderella while trying to fulfill one of my New Year’s Resolution’s (exercising on the treadmill for an eternity), so many things in the movie inspired me.  I must confess that Cinderella is my favorite fairy tale because my own personal story is as close to an X-rated Cinderella tale as any living human being that I’ve ever met (check out my first book, Monsters’ Throwdown).  In fact, for me to be a pessimist after all that I have overcome would be sheer blasphemy and the highest form of ingratitude.

By the end of the movie, I was undone.  Because so many of the lines from it touched my heart, I was inspired to put together a 2016 list of optimistic predictions in the face of so much doom and gloom that the news is predicting we will suffer as Americans.  I’ll hold onto them and check back with you this time 2017, and we can determine what type of prophetess I am—one who is a naïve piece of work, or one who just might be onto something.  All the predictions are based on courage and kindness—a major theme of Chris Weitz (the writer of the screenplay) and Kenneth Branagh’s (the director) interpretation of the classic Cinderella story.

***

ELEANOR’S 2016 PREDICTIONS

PREDICTION #1:  My first prediction is a personal one.  In 2014/2015 I was diagnosed with “The Sugar” (diabetes for my non-Black readers).  I was and still am determined to kick its ass via diet and exercise.  I am happy to report that by the end of 2015, I no longer need medication nor am I considered a diabetic.  (I did so by first firing the nasty-ass doctor I had who tried to convince me there was no other hope for me except insulin or I would lose my toes, my feet, and my eye sight—you know who you are Dr. CY—may you be accursed!)  Once I found a doc who was willing to work with me, he strategically and safely walked me away from the poor medical advice and the number that would categorize me as a full-blown diabetic, and as he said to me several weeks ago:  “Congratulations, you have transformed your body out of being a diabetic [no longer needing medication] to a pre-diabetic.  You should be proud of yourself.  Given a couple more months—even that will be history.”   I AM IN LOVE WITH MY NEW DOCTOR!!  I predict that by the end of 2017, I will look back on this scary medical phase in my life as a bad distant memory.

***

“ELLA CONTINUED TO SEE THE WORLD AS IT COULD BE—NOT AS IT IS . . .”—Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother

***

Pre Christmas Weight Cam Cardow Cagle Cartoons

Cartoon used by permission: Cam Cardow, Cagle Cartoons

PREDICTION #2:  I never thought I’d ever hear myself saying this, but Donald Trump will probably win the Republican nomination to run for President, and that will be a very good thing!  (Nope, I haven’t lost my mind.) I’m beginning to see Trump as a gift to our country as he exposes the racism, the xenophobia, the homophobia, the heartless gun-lust, duplicity, and godless greed of a significant group of people in the GOP (not all Republicans—some of my best friends are Repubs—but enough to destroy this Grand Old Party that once freed the slaves).   Trump is not the savior he so arrogantly thinks himself to be, but his behavior is a reflection of what has been hidden for years within the GOP.

I think Trump will win the primary, wiping out all of his Republican opponents as he blocks the entry way of the path to the Oval Office. Then he will hand the election to the Democrats in an overwhelming victory because the tide of resistance that will rise up against him in America will be greater than the power of his fear-driven, blind followers who are spewing venom and hatred.   (Remember, we are the nation that passed the Civil Rights Act without a bloody coup but on the backs of martyrs, twice elected a Black president to the chagrin of many Republicans, legalized gay marriage in all 50 states with major resistance, and we are still the most generous nation on Earth which shows a great deal of courage and kindness.)

We (Americans) are better than Donald Trump, and we will prove it. The GOP created this monster, kept silent when Trump falsely accused the President (over and over again) of not being a true American or a “Christian,” and someone who would destroy our country when all of the evidence proved otherwise. Now the chickens have come home to roost.   I predict that in the end, Trump will destroy the GOP’s chance to occupy the White House for decades to come.

***

“THOUGH ELLA WAS SAD, HER SPIRIT WAS NOT BROKEN.”—Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother

***

Super Trump Milt Priggee, www.miltpriggee.com

Cartoon used by permission: Milt Priggee, www.miltpriggee.com

PREDICTION #3 

We’ve temporarily lost our minds over the myriad terrorists who threaten us from around the world—including our home grown ones.  But President Roosevelt was correct:  “We have nothing to fear but fear itself.”  I predict that if we take a deep collective breath, shake off our fears—stoke the courage embers—and stick to our values (in many cases, figure out what our values are), we will be able to separate the demons from those who need our kindness.  I predict that we will do the right thing in the end toward our own citizens that need a helping hand as well as those who reach out to us who are victims of terrorists in 2016.

***

“HAVE COURAGE AND BE KIND . . . AND ALL WILL BE WELL”—Cinderella

***

Know Your Enemy John Cole The Scranton Times Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: John Cole, The Scranton Times-Tribune/Cagle Cartoons

PREDICTION #4: 

I predict that God (who, if I know anything about his character, “don’t do ugly”) will show himself to be God in 2016—bringing down so many of the posers who claim to be “doing God’s will”—from the Bundy standoff in Nevada to ISIS leaders in the Middle East.  They won’t all go away in 2016 (there will always be people who claim to speak for God until the end of time), but I predict that there will be a significant amount who meet their demise.  Do you remember how many people claimed to be doing God’s will when they ran for president or vice president over the last decade—“God told me to run for office!”—Palin, Bachmann, Cain, Carson, Jeb Bush, Perry, Romney, Jindal, Walker, Kasich, Santorum, Huckabee, and Cruz.  Either God has been hedging his bets over the last decade or he is messin’ with the GOP.  I choose to believe the latter.

I also predict that 2016 will be the year the Conservative Evangelical church is going to lose its shit!  So many of my ex-peeps have jumped into bed with the Tea Party and the Right Wing talk show and arch-conservative social media groups (Fox, Breitbart, World Net, Jones, Limbaugh, and the like) that they wouldn’t recognize Jesus if he came to Earth and walked on water right in front of their eyes.  They would swear it was Obama trying to trick them into liking a Muslim posing as Jesus doing a magic trick.  The weeping and gnashing of teeth within those groups when McCain and then again Romney lost to Obama (I know because I got their emails) will be child’s play compared to the devastation that will be coming from those quarters.  They will fall all over each other predicting America’s demise because we’ve “turned our backs on God” when we don’t elect their delusional candidates.  Watch this space.

***

“KINDNESS IS FREE; LOVE IS FREE”—Cinderella

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Doing God's Will Pat Bagley Salt Lake Tribune

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“KINDNESS IS FREE; LOVE IS FREE”—Cinderella

***

PREDICTION #5: 

I predict that what changes in 2016 regarding gun control will be incremental and seem almost pointless, but we shouldn’t get discouraged.  One day, our gun control laws will change—the 2nd Amendment will be changed. The Constitution is not written in stone—if it were, I’d still be a slave, which I’m sure some people would like, but I would find it rather inconvenient.  I predict that what will happen in 2016 is more and more murders, accidents, and suicides by guns will occur—more than we can humanely tolerate.  At some point, these horrific scenes will begin to wash up on the shores of the politicians and gun lobbyists’ families, their neighbors, and their friends at an alarming rate, causing them to reevaluate which is more important—their loved ones’ rights to fulfill their destiny on Earth or a gun owner’s right to pack heat.  (There is nothing as persuasive as an avid gun owner turned gun control crusader.)  In the meantime, I’m hitting my knees and praying that God will have mercy on us all.

***

“EVEN THOUGH IT’S WHAT’S DONE, DOESN’T MEAN IT’S WHAT SHOULD BE DONE.”—Cinderella 

***

Gun Place in America Pat Bagley Salt Lake Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: Pat Bagley, Salt Lake Tribune/Cagle Cartoons

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ELEANOR’S SELAH (“AHA”) MOMENT ABOUT 2016

I am discovering that 2016 could be an amazing year of opportunity even though it has already gotten off to a very scary start.  To get through it is going to take a lot of courage enveloped in an ocean of kindness.  I predict that there are enough of us with deep humanity who will be able to take 2016 by the horns, kick America’s demons to the curb, and “Make America Great Again” sans Trump and all that he stands for.  Are you with me?

***

“I FORGIVE YOU”—Cinderella

(The last thing Cinderella says to her evil stepmother before departing with the Prince)

***

Forgiveness Pat Bagley Salt Lake Tribune

Cartoon used by permission: Pat Bagley, Salt Lake Tribune/Cagle Cartoons

INSPIRTIONAL QUOTES ON COURAGE AND KINDNESS

 “Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.”—Winston Churchill

“One isn’t necessarily born with courage, but one is born with potential. Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can’t be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest.”—Maya Angelou

“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.”—Mark Twain

Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.”—Og Mandino

***

IN MEMORY OF DAVID BOWIE

RIP

 (1947-2016)

David Bowie David Fitzsimmons The Arizona Star

Cartoon used by permission: David Fitzsimmons, The Arizona Star/Cagle Cartoons

“And these children that you spit on

 As they try to change their worlds

 Are immune to your consultations

 They’re quite aware of what they’re going through.”

(Lyrics from the song: “Changes” by David Bowie)

***

ALL INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES FROM www.brainyquotes.com

WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE AUTHOR?  Check out www.eleanortomczyk.com

WANT TO READ THE AUTHOR’S LATEST BOOKS (Monsters’ Throwdown and Fleeing Oz)?  ON SALE NOW AT AMAZON!

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Eleanor Tomczyk and “How the Hell Did I End Up Here?” with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 
8 Comments

Posted by on January 11, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,